Katya: your confidence in me fade away

I am pleased to write to you today. You're important to me and at this stage of my life, I live only for you.
Sorry, but I think we should get pausa. This is a very unpleasant and painful decision for me. I do not want you to suffer. You became for me a very expensive man, but I see no other solution.
Now I am in Moscow and I am writing from internet cafes. I got to Moscow good, but I have a problem without solving that, I can not come to you. Because, I haven't small sum of money. For me it's a shame, ask your financial aid, and I will not do that. So, I decided to end our correspondence, because I do not want you to think about me is wrong.
I tried to solve this problem myself, but I did not get. I think that you refuse to help me. As I told you earlier, for this reason that we should end our conversation. I think you're going to accuse me and your confidence in me fade away. I do not want to hear the screams and insults from the person to whom I have a warm, loving feelings. My heart will be broken.
I am in complete disarray, my angel, I'm really afraid of losing you. I feel so bad now, I shake hands, and quivering voice. On my eyes with tears. I do not know what I do, I think you're not going to help me and you will reject me. Please understand that I do not want to hear it in my address insults and accusations. Please do not tell me bad words.
I look forward to your letter with your thoughts on the matter. I am very afraid of losing you and in your heart do not believe that you refuse to help me.
You're a wonderful person, we have built huge plans for our future. Is this all just collapses in a moment ?

I do not want and I will not believe it. You should always keep a positive hope. I'm sure between us all out.
Do you agree with me ?
During our conversation I am very much accustomed to you, and I want to be with you in real life. I want passionate, to some extent wild, and longer sex with you, my angel. I am burning with the thought that soon you come to me. Now everything is in jeopardy and I am very upset. Probably, I was so stupid, thinking that was the happiest woman in this vast world.
I look forward to your answer.
Your passionate kitten,